Ah ha moment

During church yesterday I had one of those "Ah ha" moments. Attending a large church has it's definite advantages, and sometimes it can create an issue. Pinelake is a large church and the sight of all the people can be very intimidating for someone who has Asperger's Syndrome and sometimes for someone who doesn't have it.

We were excited to learn that Riley would have Susan's sister, Jessica and her husband Nick, as Riley's Sunday School teacher. At least having someone in the family as a teacher can be calming. However this week the Ragan family was gone on vacation. I did not really think about this prior to getting to church.

I dropped off the family at the door and went to park the car. As I came into church, I myself can feel overwhelmed at the number of people who attend church at times. So I stopped in to check on Riley before grabbing a seat for worship. He was sitting by himself waiting for church to start for the kids. I asked him if he was ok, and went about my way, as he said he shook his head yes.

While waiting for the sanctuary to empty, from the earlier service, I had the "Ah ha" moment. Susan was singing in the choir, so I was alone and I myself felt overwhelmed at the number of people. Then it hit me. If I was feeling nervous about being around the number of people, what was my son feeling with Asperger's? So I decided to go ask him. I went back to the kids worship center and asked him. "Riley, since Jessica is not here, would you like to come to big church with me?". A simple, but emphatic head nod yes was all I needed to get the point. He was struggling with everything. He came to the sanctuary, with a larger crowd, but this time he had a comforting factor, me. He did very well for his first time in the big church. I pointed out to him that Susan was singing in the choir, and he tried to get her attention by waving.

I know that seemed like a long winded story, and you may be thinking, "What's the big deal?". Well my "Ah ha" moment, was learning to change my thinking on how I see the world. I need to learn to look at the world through Riley's eyes. Instead of asking him to deal with our world, maybe we should change the world to reach out to those around us. Pinelake is an awesome place to worship with God's people. Coming together with His family and send our praises up. However for someone who suffers with social awkwardness, being in a room with a large group of people can be overwhelming.

We are learning every day to become better parents to a child with Asperger's. Learning to try and understand how he thinks and process information. Knowing where any problems may originate and cut them off. Make sure that we look at the world through his eyes, and try and process information in the same way he does.

Let's remember that not every person sees the world the way we do.


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